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New year wish-list!

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Well this is it – the big count down to 2012.

I’ve learned to be by myself & I think for me I’ve done ok so far. I don’t want to start 2012 on a down note – so I am staying as positive as i can for a brighter future.I don’t know if this is a great thing to say but I am looking forward to 2012 with great expectation and little depression– things have got to change round here and who knows what I will be writing at this time next year.

My wish list for 2012

(Some serious – some not so.)

 
1.
The word(s) I would most like to disappear from people’s vocabulary: whatever and f#%k you.

2.The interests that I would most like to learn: swimming.

3.The person with whom I would like to spend the most time in 2012 (and eternity): my BF.

4.The people that I would most like to see absolutely best in health:Mom-n-Dad.

5.The one place I would want to go again:Delhi.

6.The food that I would most like to sample for the first time in 2012: steak and shushi.

7.The person I would love to see got married:My sis.

8.The guy-game I would love to see get vanished:CounterStrike.

9.The TV programme I would like to see more of:P.K.Y.E.K.

10.The celebrity that I would most like to take early retirement by next Christmas:Katy perry(My BF’s fav)

and the last one, to see myself in a good shape,happilly living life without any worries!!!




Again a new year!

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As the New Year comes, one can’t help but wonder why at this time of year we always feel the need to review our lives and make changes to it. Everything else in society by which we often measure our success has a different time frame; the tax year doesn’t start till April, nor the Academic year till September. And yet each year, on December 31st, when the clock strikes twelve, we begin to decide (again) what we want our lives to be like.

Much like a school report, the phrases ‘Lacks focus’ or ‘Must try harder’ can be applied. And just like school reports, resolutions are terribly disastrous!.Some of the pledges i know people made recently are  such as: ‘Become less addicted to facebook’, ‘Start internet dating’ or ‘Act more and Tweet Less’,Lose weight. Exercise more. Eat less meat. Stop smoking. Read more. Work on career. Become more confident. Find love. 

(However, by and large, they always stay the same!)

Most people admit that every year, at least one or two of their resolutions stay the same. This tells us of two things: that either they enjoy choosing resolutions that they know they can keep, OR that they have no intention of keeping them in the first place. So why do we even bother? May be it is because when the year comes around again, we just can’t help thinking about how it went.  After experiencing 365 days of a year we like to believe that the next 365 will be different!!! That somehow we will become fitter, happier(well you can say,better versions of ourselves.) Some of us will promise to be more active, while others will promise to try and relax. For those of us who feel we’ve achieved a lot, we still want to achieve more, and for those of us who have had a terrible year,(just as in my case!)well…we’ll just be glad it’s over! And we do all this because we are human, and if we didn’t, we would probably cease to exist at all… if we spent each day considering our life as much as we do in the first few days of January, then frankly, we wouldn’t be living it.

Words from my heart!

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You’re my honey bunch,
sugar plum,
pumpie umpy umpkin…
you’re my sweetie pie.

You’re my cuppy cake,
gum drop,
snookum snookums
you’re…
the apple of my eye!

Sometimes it’s difficult to show you how much you mean to me
So perhaps words from my heart would be easier…

Every morning when I wake up
You are the first thing I think about
I am fortunate to have you as MY boyfriend
No-one is as perfect for me as you areYou take my hand and warm my heart
I’ve never felt these kind of feelings before
Being in your presence turns my world around
You put the smile on my face and the sparkles in my eyes!

Your words mean the world to me
You know just what to say
To make everything seem ok
With you by my side I feel I can conquer any struggle life throws me

Your beautiful inside and out
In every way imaginable
I know you have your own problems
Trapped within your heart

Please let me be the one you can open up to
I will be your shoulder to cry on
Your pole to keep you from falling
And I’ll always be the girlfriend you need me to be.

I’m happiest with you
Every other problem fades when I am with you
When you hold me
My entire body tingles and warms up
You give me the desire to live life to the full
With you I’m confident, I trust you.

I love spending time with you
Staring at you
Hugging you
Kissing you
Loving you

So one day
Instead of having to wake up,
Thinking of you
Maybe I’ll wake up
Next to you…!!!

I simply love the Winters.

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I LOVE winter. It’s my favorite season and I wish it could last even longer. Before you accuse me of being crazy, here are (at least) 10 reasons why Winter rocks:

1.What is nicer than curling up on the sofa under a blanket? Sofa + blanket+ DVD = happiness. Throw in a person to curl up with and now you’re talking bliss!

2.I don’t like the pressure of spring and summer. The pressure of being out, “enjoying the weather”, walking, running, gardening…the list goes on. With winter, you have a ready-made (and valid) excuse to just relax. Dark before even leaving the house, you can settle in at home, doing very little without the guilt and pressure of “doing”.

3.With winter, everything slows down. Naturally following on from reasons 1 and 2, evening relaxation starts much earlier than in spring and summer. So you have more time, it’s true! Don’t ask me to explain the physics but I’m sure I have a ton more time in winter. Okay, it’s not that I use the extra time for much, but I know I have i need it!

4.I love layers and I love wearing clothes. And while I may be also admitting to very low self esteem in the body image department, it doesn’t change the fact that deciding what to wear in winter is fun! Cardigans, coats, scarves, gloves, hats…FUN! And on really cold days you can dress in all black and pretend you’re a ninja. Some of you will insist being a pirate is more fun but I disagree, it’s ninja all the way, baby!

5.I love winter foods. Warm, starchy, carb-laden and usually with oodles of flavor and sauce.to list a few, hearty chicken bucket from KFC, double cheese pizza from MC DONALDS, chilling Cold-cofee with icecream from CCD, my mom-made Hot-chocolate late at night and more – Winter means love on a plate!

6.Winter is nature’s way of saying “give yourself a break”. With little daylight, the need to hibernate and lower energy, you just don’t need to give yourself a hard time with all the “shoulds” in your life. Therefore when you do manage to get something done, you can feel the afterglow of satisfaction for greater periods of time.

7.Where do the bugs  go in winter? Are they like me, cozying up on the sofa and enjoying love on a plate? Who knows. But wha i do know is they’re not in my house! Summer shows gazillions of spiders in every corner, nook and cranny but not in winter! My house is spider free (I don’t mind them generally but it was a bit creepy to count 12 in my bathroom at one point last summer).  Plus my pet Lucydoesn’t seem bothered by fleas during the winter either, so winter is bug-free and we like it!

8.While Christmas Day itself is always a come down and New Years has never done much for me, one reason I love winter IS the holiday season! I love the all the build up and expectations with decorations, gift giving, parties and Christmas carols.]

9.Whether you like showers or baths better, can anyone disagree that when it’s wintery, dark and cold, a long hot shower is cozy? Hot showers in summer are wasted on me, I mean who wants to sweat while taking a shower?  But winter means luxuriating in the shower, slowly turning down the cold water so make that water bearable. Getting pink and wrinkly, that’s what it’s about in Winter (wait, was that me going too far?)

10.Winter is ideal for idle chit chat! At the bus stop, in the shops, at the stores, on wordpress – there’s so much good material for conversation thanks to Winter and all the weather that’s associated with it!

My fairytale wedding!

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Let’s be honest. I was never one of those girls who spent their childhood and youth dreaming about their wedding and planning every detail. Truly, the idea of being in a relationship horrified me and being so hopeful that I might ever find a boy I’d want to date let alone marry seemed like a  curse! However, things never happen how you expect them to and while I’m not engaged(but thinking about being engaged soon, my opinion about the future has been changed since being in a relationship.)

My BF is the man of my dreams and I’ve already figured out every detail of my wedding specifically with him in mind, and I’ve started to realize how wonderful it is to have a best friend you have a crush on who has a crush on you too and that my wedding will be a wonderful day for getting to officiate with that special person for a lifetime. I think it’s pretty cool.
Anyways, it only became clear to me this year when I started to daydream that there was only one place I can ever get married. And, in the blink of an eye and spark of one memory, my location is solidified.
I’ll walk down the aisle on the sandy beaches of GOA through a meadow filled with thousands of wildflowers overlooking the Mountains. I really really love the idea of almost a “Fairytale” theme. Now, bear with me. I’m not thinking glitter and little fairies. I’m thinking natural wood tables and seating, lots of wildflowers at the tables, and just a natural feel. Glass vases for wild sunflowers and daises in multiple colors, white lace tablecloths, dark wood tables.I would love to be able to find an old barn or something for the reception. A massive brunch with pancakes, bacon, omelets, French Toast, and every breakfast food known to man. I want it to be super casual and low key- no caterers for this girl! Since the ceremony would take place in the early morning, the reception would occur in the morning, also. (a beachside would probably be best if I could find a lawn or meadow for it to occur, far from the public!) .After the reception, I want it to be like any other day we’ve spent as a friends…boating, water skiing, tubing, fishing, and playing! And everyone would have to enjoy the beach,coz my BF loves waterly things so..!!

When I picture the bridal party, I want to maintain the fun fairytale-whimsical theme. I picture from one of my favourite movie ‘beauty and the beast’.  And…for my dress… let me tell you, that’s the one thing I can’t picture! I know I want something classic. Something flattering. Something I’ll look at fifty years later and still think it’s as beautiful as the day I wore it. I love lace. I love classic cuts. I love simple! No crazy trains, no crazy frills, no mermaid styles, no poofs and no puffs!
I want my wedding to be fun. I want pictures of me and my hubby to be jumping off a dock into the water.(well that simply horrifies me,but thats what i want to do with the love of my life,holding hands…you know that takes away all your fears!)I want everyone to dance.I want lots of good, home cooked food. I want affordable. I want comfortable. I want it to be small but grand so I can feel like I can celebrate with each and every person there.I want it to be “A FAIRYTALE WEDDING”!

Can’t sleep tonight!

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I can’t remember the last time I laughed so hard I could forget my pain, because it always came back haunting me, making me sad.

I guess that’s why I needed him…(my BF)

He made me feel special and happy, even if sometimes I hated him because of the things he did.But i love you a hell lot than you can ever imagine!!!

So here’s a little remembrance of the memories we hold so close to our heart!

I CAN’T SLEEP TONIGHT

I try to sleep but I cannot!
your memory invades my every thought.
I’ve been up all night thinking of you,
and can’t help but wondering, are you thinking of me too?
I try to picture you, imagine what you are doing.
Are you missing me as much as I’m missing you?
I’ve been tossing and turning all night long,
regretting things I’ve said and done.
Then I start to wonder if maybe you’re sorry too.
Maybe it was a nightmare, and I’ll wake up in your arms,
where I’ll be warm and cozy and safe from harm.
I cannot sleep without you by my side,
without your body next to mine.
I can’t sleep without my head on your chest,
listening to your every breath.
I can’t sleep tonight, not without you,
so please come back so this nightmare will be through.

My heart isn’t a toy!

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It’s funny how your special someone  can break your heart  in two  and Kill your heart. Then expect it to recover.

I am wounded. He yelled at me,when there wasn’t any fault of mine and  yet still says he loves me and talks as if it kills him to be so busy with friends and so-called works. He makes me so confused and I don’t know what to do. Of course I am going to move on but I can never let him go. Boys say we are confusing.. yeah right! They play with our emotions, make us love them, break our hearts, and go on to play with the next girl’s heart like it is one of their little toys. A heart is not a toy and it is not to be messed with as such. My heart is broken and I may be really stupid but I still love my BF with all those shattered pieces. Why does this have to be my life? Why do I get screwed over in relationships? I mean am I that bad of a girlfriend to the point where guys find a girl and break my heart? I feel like shit. And I am ready to give up on love. Anyway, love doesn’t suck. With the wrong person maybe. But it just hurts. No one is perfect, I just know in my soul he is my perfect match and I can’t let him go. So we will move on but never let go of our love, because if we are really meant to be the way it seems, and this really is fate, then we maybe he’ll understand my love for him  in the future. No hopes up just gotta wait out and see. Until then I am gonna live my life and try to enjoy it.

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