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Are you bored?

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Are you constantly bored? Are you always just lying around the house looking for something to keep you busy? It may be time to find a new hobby.

Make a list of random activities you have heard of that you might want to try. Put everything you can think of. If your not sure if you would like something put it anyway, you just might love it!

Having trouble finding some ideas? Walk through your local craft store and look at some things that you would love to learn how to make.

Look in the newspapers for some cheap local classes. Hey, if you take the class and don’t like the hobby, at least you get to meet people on the way.

Ask yourself some basic questions. Would you like to make things? Do you like hands- on activities? Do you find yourself artistic? And so on.

Cross off things that you feel you have no interest for. It may help you to figure out what you don’t like fist.

Ask your friends, family, partner, etc. what they do in their free time. Maybe you will get some ideas.

Keep on trying. Do not give up. You will find your calling eventually.

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Teardrops will kiss the morning dew!

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“Now all that’s left of me, is what I pretend to be. Sewn together but still so broken up inside.”
I’ve not been able to write anything for a while. I didn’t know how to put the feelings I’ve experienced in the last few days into words.A broken promise from my boyfriend led to an argument!! And now I’m so left-alone!

Well.. Loneliness is one of our greatest dreads. Most of us have felt it. Most of us have feared it.To feel lonely is to be overwhelmed by an unbearable feeling of separateness, at a very deep level. From time to time, we all experience the odd bout of loneliness. Sometimes it can creep up on us during periods of change (like a move or the end of a relationship, for example), and leave us feeling physically or emotionally distanced from other people. Loneliness doesn’t just strike when we’re by ourselves, either. It can be just as easy to feel lonely in a throng of people when you’re feeling disconnected.

Time heals all wounds. Poetry helps too.

I miss the times when you were here
telling me to have no fear
To hold my head up high and strong
add happy notes to my sad song

I miss the way you look at me
As if I were too blind to see
The path I’m on might hurt and scathe
But all goes well if you just have faith

I miss the sound of your sweet voice
Through bitter times a saving noise
That told me what was right and wrong
But rang in my ears for far too long

A caring person, you were such
That helped and hurt me, oh so much
You’d guide and mislead me through the day
You left me lonely when I’d rather you stay

Over things like that you had no control
A rock set in motion will continue to roll
No matter how hard you tug and heave
You were always pushed and forced to leave

Then one day you never returned
My tears so hot they almost burned
Aware now about what I lack
But crying and mourning wont bring you back

For me to let out what I need to say
I can’t do much more than pray
No longer am I weak, my hearts quite strong
From adding a happy chorus to a sad, sad song!!!

How many chances should you give him?

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How many chances should you give a guy before you end-up a relationship?

It really does depend on what you are giving him another chance for. It is reasonable to give him a few chances to remember to put the toilet seat down because it is not a major offense like having an affair. The key word is reasonable. If a guy  constantly lies about where he is and you keep catching him, if you don’t end the relationship, you have basically accepted the behavior and it becomes a part of your relationship.

Relationships should have set, permanent boundaries, not temporary ones. If you do not want to be with a guy who lies all the time, then end your relationship with the guy  who is lying to you all the time. When a guy knows he can get away with something, not only will he do it, but he doesn’t fear the consequences of doing it. You cannot say you won’t tolerate a guy who cheats on you and stay with a guy  who continues to cheat on you.

Most people believe in second chances. They want to think they would be given a second chance, and I understand that. It is one thing to screw up at work and hope, or feel you deserve a second chance. It is another to think you can do something that will end a relationship and get a second chance. The things that end relationships are serious in almost all cases. Do they really deserve a second chance when they cheated on you? Definateley  not when they abused you in any way, shape or form. So how many chances should you give him?

Chances are, if you are reading this post, you already gave him too many!!!

It feels like LOVE,but is it?

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Sometimes it feels impossible to find someone who’s right for you — and who thinks you’re right for him or her! So when it happens, you’re usually so psyched that you don’t even mind when your little brother finishes all the ice cream or your English teacher chooses the one day when you didn’t do your reading to give you a pop quiz.

It’s totally normal to look at the world through rose-colored glasses in the early stages of a relationship. But for some people, those rose-colored glasses turn into blinders that keep them from seeing that a relationship isn’t as healthy as it should be.

So what makes a healthy Relationship?

You’ve probably heard lots of stuff about how guys and girls don’t seem to speak the same language. We all know how many different meanings the little phrase “no, nothing’s wrong” can have, depending on who’s saying it! But what’s important is to ask if you’re not sure what he or she means, and speak honestly and openly so that the miscommunication is avoided in the first place. Never keep a feeling bottled up because you’re afraid it’s not what your BF or GF wants to hear or because you worry about sounding silly. And if you need some time to think something through before you’re ready to talk about it, the right person will give you some space to do that if you ask for it.

In a healthy relationship, everyone needs to make compromises. But that doesn’t mean you should feel like you’re losing out on being yourself. When you started going out, you both had your own lives (families, friends, interests, hobbies, etc.) and that shouldn’t change. Neither of you should have to pretend to like something you don’t, or give up seeing your friends, or drop out of activities you love. And you also should feel free to keep developing new talents or interests, making new friends, and moving forward.

You need to have give-and-take in your relationship, too. Do you take turns choosing which new movie to see? As a couple, do you hang out with your partner’s friends as often as you hang out with yours? It’s not like you have to keep a running count and make sure things are exactly even, of course. But you’ll know if it isn’t a pretty fair balance. Things get bad really fast when a relationship turns into a power struggle, with one person fighting to get his or her way all the time.

Does he or she get how cool you are and why? (Watch out if the answer to the first part is yes but only because you’re acting like someone you’re not!) The key is that your BF or GF is into you for who you are — for your great sense of humor, your love of reality TV, etc. Does your partner listen when you say you’re not comfortable doing something and then back off right away? Respect in a relationship means that each person values who the other is and understands — and would never challenge — the other person’s boundaries.

Hopefully, you and your significant other are treating each other well. Not sure if that’s the case? Take a step back from the dizzying sensation of being swept off your feet and think about whether your relationship has these qualities!

So what makes an unhealthy Relationship?

A relationship is unhealthy when it involves mean, disrespectful, controlling, or abusive behavior.

When a boyfriend or girlfriend uses verbal insults, mean language, nasty putdowns, gets physical by hitting or slapping, or forces someone into sexual activity, it’s an important warning sign of verbal, emotional, or physical abuse.

Ask yourself, does my boyfriend or girlfriend:

1.get angry when I don’t drop everything for him or her?

2.criticize the way I look or dress, and say I’ll never be able to find anyone else who would date me?

3.keep me from seeing friends or from talking to any other guys or girls?

4.want me to quit an activity, even though I love it?

5.ever raise a hand when angry, like he or she is about to hit me?

6.try to force me to go further sexually than I want to?

These aren’t the only questions you can ask yourself. If you can think of any way in which your boyfriend or girlfriend is trying to control you, make you feel bad about yourself, isolate you from the rest of your world, or — this is a big one — harm you physically or sexually, then it’s time to get out, fast.

It can be tempting to make excuses or misinterpret violence, possessiveness, or anger as an expression of love. But even if you know that the person hurting you loves you, it is not healthy. No one deserves to be hit, shoved, or forced into anything he or she doesn’t want to do.

 

Ruining the relationship!

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There’s something people  should know about me: I’m a bit of a worry-wart. I worry about what people think of me, I worry something will happen to my dog(and then who will help me weed out the bad guys?)and, worst of all, I worry that I’m screwing up my RELATIONSHIP with my BF!

I was reading a book on Abnormal Psychology that says that excessive worrying can be a detriment to a perfectly happy Relationship. (Great, now I can add that to my list!) It makes sense to me that focusing on the negative can turn a plum of a relationship into a sour apple.

So Here are the few things we shouldn’t be doing to ruin, “the healthy relationship”!

Do not take him for-granted

Little acts of generosity have been proven to be the basics of a healthy relationship, so return the favor and do things for him that show you care.He’s choosing to be with you. He doesn’t HAVE to be. So, remind him how special he is to you. Don’t forget to say “Thank you” for taking you out or remembering to bring home your favorite mango shake from the market!

Do not give Ultimatums

No one likes to be threatened and saying, “I’ll leave you unless…” and “You better do this or…” will only cause a divide between you.Well… that behavior is better left to the kidos. (Remember saying, “If you want to be my friend, you have to play with me/give me your toy/never talk to that girl again?”) That’s not gonna work after you graduate high school. so just avoid threatening with those silly statements.

Do not spy out of jealousy or insecurity

OK, so we’re human and we all have bouts of the above, but the trick is to not let it eat away at you and cause you to start checking his phone and email every time he leaves the room.Or monitoring his web history while he’s away from you. He thinks you’re awesome. (And you are!) So unless you have a real reason to believe he’s seeing someone else or he doesn’t love you just the way you are, don’t let it drive your behavior.

Do not act Clingy

Both are equally detrimental. Individuality is important in a relationship. If he wants to go out with his friends, give him the space to do so. And, conversely, if he shows you affection and asks for intimacy, respect his desires. The more you pull away, the more he’ll think you’re not invested in the relationship.

Do not stop Communicating
You can talk all you want, but once you stop expressing yourself, sharing and working through issues, the relationship will be at a standstill. This also goes for ignoring him. I don’t think there’s anything more painful than being shut out and not listened to. So, there you have it. Tell him how you feel, why you do the things you do, and what you love about him. It will bring you closer and strengthen your bond.
Is anyone guilty of the above? (I know I am!) Which ones are the hardest for you?


 


 

Open your eyes!

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To some degree guys are just as faithful as their options. If you leave a guy with fewer options, he is less likely to cheat on you.

How would you feel if I told you that your guy  cheated on you because you are an ugly, overweight, boring, lousy lover who can’t get anything right and even though your guy  tried to make things work, your old-fashioned, sexually stubborn self never agreed to compromise? Ouch! That sounds pretty harsh. It’s just a lot easier to call a guy  a pig!

The problem is that sometimes people are quick to point the finger at others rather than analyze why the individual cheated. Maybe your own actions had a big role in pushing the other to the brink of temptation.
The common belief is, “I’m not a bad person”. I don’t need to change, I’m not the one who cheated. The result is that the whole process repeats itself without being rectified, which is probably why so many guys and girls  complain about having been cheated on in so many relationships.
So why do people cheat? The answer is quite simple. People do not cheat because they’re pigs, sows, bitches, or dogs. It all comes down to two basic drives: the physical sexual drive and the emotional need.

People usually cheat because there is a conflict between their physical and emotional desires. By accepting and understanding these shortcomings — instead of ignoring them — we can hopefully work harder to make sure that our partners are satisfied enough to resist any instinctual sexual urge.
The question you have to ask yourself is which drive is stronger, and which one has a bigger influence in your life. In general, each person is different, but it is generally the physical sexual drive that dominates a person’s actions.Why? Because this drive has been present in human behavior for millions of years. Whereas the emotional  need has only been around for a few thousand years, obviously a few thousand years of emotional needs will not overcome millions of years of one’s evolutionary sexual drive.

When a guy falls for temptation, he might forget what attracted him to his girl in the first place, and lose sight of the chemistry and infatuation he once experienced for that girl. It is a delusion to believe that a relationship should always progress smoothly on the road to eternal bliss. However, focusing on the negative will lead one to perceive that they are so miserable that they seek to fulfill their needs elsewhere.

Cheating is simple! but a relationship is more complicated. Cheating usually offers instant gratification, physically and emotionally. A relationship requires lots of maintenance. Giving it care and attention along with trust and communication will continuously help both people grow.
So if you become involved with another person, you owe it to yourself and your girlfriend/ boyfriend to be honest. Creating lie upon lie will only hurt everyone involved. Take a close look at your relationship before seeking happiness with another person.

Knowing a Girl!

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Knowing what a girl wants is the dream of every guy. Because if you know what she wants, it will be easier for her to please her and also please yourself.

The very first thing you need to know about understanding  girls  is that they are also human beings. And just like you do not know what you want sometimes, so don’t they. Thus, women are not “all knowing beings”. In addition, all girls are different. Just like all guys are different. Only with time and effort you will be able to better understand girls.

Listen: use both your ears and all other senses and pay attention to a girl. She might tell things to you in words or by body language. You will need to understand what her words mean and also how she expresses herself.

Asking: do not assume things when it comes to  girls, but ask them instead when you do not know something. They might not always give you a fair answer but you can always try.

Comfort: for a girl to open up to you, she must feel safe with you. So make sure she feels safe before you expect her to tell you all her secrets. This is one of the most important things if you want to know what women want. Because, when a  girl feels comfortable with you, she will be more likely to open up and dare to speak her mind. You are less likely to hear the truth from a woman who does not feel safe with you.

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